Tonight I got home from a 6 hour drive from Nebraska. One of my closest friends lost her sister to cancer last week and a couple of us drove down to be by her side for the funeral. I got home about 8:15 and the husband was watching the much anticipated Vikings vs Packer game. I got the kids ready for bed and tucked them in. With my daughter we have a plan...10 mins with mom or dad and then 30 mins on her own. We are hoping this will help her learn to calm herself and fall asleep. Her and I were laughing as I tucked her in. I stayed with her for 10 min and then headed downstairs to watch the game. Within 5 mins she was downstairs, when I asked her why she wasn't up stairs...the fight began. I told her that I did my part and now it was time for her to try. She became angry and started throwing a huge temper tantrum. I probably should not have, but I stuck to my guns. In some ways I feel like she is taking advantage of us, always changing the rules so she doesn't have to make any of the changes. I am sure our therapist would frown upon my tactics but I keep having this picture of my daughter at 16 not being able to cope with her sensitivity. How do I balance validating with teaching her to cope?
I tried to remain calm and kept telling my daughter that she had the power to change the situation by going up stairs and laying down quietly. That only made her more angry.
Another issue is that my little man (6 yr old son) couldn't sleep with her howling. So I allowed him to sleep on my floor until she calmed down. Oh, did that tick her off even worse. But what was I supposed to do? She would not be quiet and he couldn't sleep.
Of course, my husband's friends probably wonder what the heck is going on in our family too.
All I know is that her sensitivity is controling our household and I feel like we are making no progress forward! UGH!
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